So last week all my friends were subject to punishment! Well here's the second installment as promised. You might ask why am I reviewing what must essentially be the same movie, but here's where you are wrong. This movie was made in 1989 and was not a origin story as most of our latest comic book movies seem to think they must be. This movie take place 5 years after the gangland "execution" of Frank Castle and his family, leaving only Frank alive, only no one knows this. Thus begins a systematic hunting and killing of every major crime boss and his lackeys. This leaves the city ripe for the Yakuza...yes I said Yakuza...to move in and attempt a coup. Frank is content to allow the two sides to battle it out and then pick off the winners, until the Yakuza take it one step too far. But, sorry can't tell you more...you know the rules...this is not the spoilerific episode.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE this film! It is full of such 80's trash, sleaze, and "violence" it's hilarious. If you watch close there are very few on screen kills compared to the two later versions of this film, not to say that there aren't a lot. I feel this has a lot to do with the character development of the Punisher thru the 80's, 90's, and 2000's. When this particular Punisher was popular...he didn't always kill. In fact he had "mercy bullets" which did not kill the victim, he spent a lot of time blowing up things, and not a lot of on panel killing. Then comes the 90's...comics have to get grittier to compete with titles like Spawn, and Youngblood....hence the Thomas Jane version..this was more brutal and dark. If you question that, watch the family death scene in the first 30 minutes and then we'll talk. Then comes the 2000's, violence and dystopia was the order of the day. Heroes were killed left and right along with villains, granted they usually came back to life....it was in the 2000...2001 to be specific that Marvel came out with the Max line and you guessed it Punisher was one of it's main titles...this is what gave us that craptastic piece of crap that was "Punisher: War Zone" Don't get me wrong ...love the Max line of comics..hated the movie. My recommendation is to go out ...dig thru your bargain bins, check you second hand stores, but get you a copy of this. If you love cheesy 80's action this is the movie for you...c'mon Doplh Lundgren AND Louis Gossett Jr, and tons of stuff blowing up...oh and did I mention samurai and ninjas!!!!!
Frank Castle is a simple man. He has a loving wife and son, nice house in the suburbs, a great job, and he kills people. Ok well there is a little more to it than that. Frank works undercover bringing some of the biggest and worst criminals down, however on his last op something goes terribly wrong. Turns out that the youngest son of the biggest crime lord, Howard Saint, gets killed in Frank's last operation. This drives Saint into a revenge that rivals a "Godfather-esque" massacre, having Castle's entire family slaughtered, culminating in him witnessing the death of his wife and son. Being left for dead , Castle is rescued and nursed back to health by the local "shaman". Thus begins the life of the "Punisher". Castle devises a plan to systematically take down Saint and ruin everything he loves. Perfect family movie huh?!
I have loved the Punisher since I was a kid, ever since he was hired by the Jackal to kill Spiderman. Here you have a guy with no powers, just tons of training, guts, guns and attitude...this is also a guy who has gone toe to toe with the Hulk. Needless to say when this movie was announced I had some trepidations. You have to remember at this point Marvel was kind of hit or miss with it movies, I know we are all trying to forget what was that thing call Daredevil. When I heard Travolta was playing the big baddie I was afraid we were headed in the same direction. I was very pleased though, I thought Thomas Jane was a perfect match for this role. He is tortured, broody, intelligent, and had just the right bit of dry wit. Travolta was Travolta..over the top, and at times almost comedic. Don't get me wrong I loved this film, this is one of my favorite guilty pleasures. I completely recommend you check this one out, but a word of warning...do not go in looking for in-depth story and character development. You get some of that but this movie is for the action junkie in us...go out, find this , watch it, and justice will be served.
STAY TUNED KIDDIES MORE PUNISHER FUN COMING SOON.
THE PUNISHER (2004)
Written by: Johnathan Hensleigh and Michael France
By the 21st century most of Earth has been transformed into a nuclear wasteland, the few survivors herded together in slums. Sounds like most post-apocalyptic films right? There is a slight twist in this one though, you have to add just a bit of flavor of Terminator. The movie starts with Mo, played by Dylan McDermott, returning home to see his girlfriend during the "Christmas Cease Fire". On the way he stops a nomad who is selling odds and ends and electronic trinkets, Mo buys a metallic skull along with a few other mechanical "do-dads" to take to his girlfriend, Jill, who is a sculptor. Needless to say the "do-dads" and the skull are off the remains of a military project for a "soldier/killer" robot, which reactivates itself and puts itself back together, wherein mayhem ensues and people die. I would divulge more but this is not a "spoilerific" episode
If you love the apocalypse you should add this one to your viewing list. There really is not anything new or different here from what you have seen with others in this genre, but despite that, this one does not fail to entertain. It has everything you could hope for in "killer robot hunting humans in a post-apocalyptic world" movie, including Iggy Pop narrating in the background for you. That's right you get the "Godfather of Punk" along with everything else, so don't be a Stooge (see what I did there), go out and find this movie!
HARDWARE
Written by: Steve MacManus, Kevin O'Neill, and Richard Stanley
Directed by: Richard Stanley
Starring: Dylan McDermott, Stacey Travis and Iggy Pop
Rating: R
Runtime: 94 minutes
I recently decided I would go down that rabbit hole that is called Netflix and watch some of the lesser known horror films. I told myself I would sit through them no matter how good or bad they were, after a few movies this led me to "Last Kind Words". This movie focuses on Eli and his family, who are forced to move to the backwoods of Kentucky, to work on a farm, due to the latest economic downturns. Eli soon finds himself drawn to explore the woods that grow at the back of the farm, where he meets Amanda. Eli ends up spending more and more time away from chores, and spending that time with Amanda. Little by little he finds that the farm, the woods and Amanda are all tied together with a dark secret.
Sometimes going off the beaten path does deliver true gems and this film is one of those. This is not one of your big budget horror movies, nor was it backed by the big studios. Unlike some other independent films, where the acting can be spotty and the cinematography may not be up to snuff, this film does not have those problems. The acting is spot on and it is beautifully shot, blending just the right amount of light and dark, giving you a great taste of human nature, both love and darkness. For an independent film, hell for a film period, I HIGHLY recommend this one, this one truly made an impression on me.
LAST KIND WORDS
Written by: Kevin Barker and Amy Riherd Miller
Directed by: Kevin Barker
Starring: Brad Dourif, Spencer Daniels, Alexia Fast, Marianne Hagan, and Sarah Steele
Rating: NR
Runtime: 87 minutes
By 2006 Hugh Jackman was pretty well known by many, he had been a Magician, a Mutant, a Vampire hunter, and had established himself firmly in the halls of Nerdom. However, in 2006, a movie came along that was really unlike anything he had done before. The Fountain. This was not a huge blockbuster in the theaters, despite having well known performers in it, but has built something of a following afterwards.
Now this review is going to be a little different. Not only will I be giving you spoilers but I am also going to be doing an in-depth analysis of the movie and it's underlying themes, so I would suggest you might really want to watch this one first. If you don't, no worries, you should be able to follow along...so here we go.....
This story is really three stories in one: The story of Tommy, the brain surgeon, doing his best to save Izzi his wife from a life threatening tumor. The second story of Tomas, the conquistador, braving the savage world to find the Tree to save his Queen Isabel. Then finally, the story of Tom Creo, travelling with his Tree to mystical nebula of Xibalba.
Tommy Creo is a surgeon trying to find not just stop a type of aggressive brain tumor, but actually reverse it. Izzi his wife is dying of this very type of tumor and he is in a race to find the cure before she dies. Izzi is a writer, who is writing a story of a conquistador who must find a mystical tree in South America that will give her immortality. She explains to him the importance of Xibalba the Mayan underworld which is actually a nova in the sky the Mayans observed, she also explains the story of the True Father who sacrificed himself to allow the tree that brings life to the world to spring from his body. Izzi is desperate to have Tommy spend time with her, but he is too focused on trying to save her to realize she just needs to have him in her final times, so she comes to him and asks one thing of him.....Finish it. Finish the story.
This only spurs him on to work harder and to try new and potential dangerous experiments, that do actually show to not only cure the tumor in lab monkeys but also seems to de-age may of them lengthening their lives.. All of this proves to be too little too late, Izzi collapses and once she regains consciousness she tells Tommy she is ready to go. As his world crumbles he reads Izzi's book following the story of the conquistador, until he reaches the blank pages....it is at this point Izzi dies leaving him confused, broken and alone.
Tomas' story is one of devotion and casting out everything in your life to achieve one goal that you think will benefit the one you love. He is a conquistador who is tasked by his queen to find the hidden treasure of the Mayans, in order to save her and her kingdom. Isabel gives him a ring, letting him know that once this is completed that she will be his forever. Taking a lone priest and a contingent of men with him he sets out to find the Tree.
Following the clues it seems that all is lost on his quest, the priest is killed, and facing mutiny from his men, Tomas refuses to quit. Down to himself and three men, Tomas finds the pyramid where his quest will end. As they push forward they are confronted by a huge mass of Mayans, causing two of his men to flee and be killed. Now Tomas and his lone man left fight their way through the Mayans, resulting in his man being killed, leaving Tomas on his own to face what looks like certain death. He is disarmed except for and ornamental dagger and carried to the foot of the pyramid, where he is dumped as the Mayans retreat. Climbing to the top he is confronted by the high priest, who mortally wounds Tomas before being killed. Tomas staggers to the Tree where he carves into it with the dagger. The Tree begins to "leak" a white fluid that Tomas puts on his wound causing it to heal. Amazed by this, and succumbing to greed, he drinks the fluid, mouthful after mouthful. The result is Tomas' death as he begins to sprout flowers and vegetation, returning him to the earth knowing now he will never save his Queen because of his greed and folly.
This brings us to the third part of the story...the enigmatic Tom Creo. This story is of Tom in his bubble ship transporting the Tree through the nebula Xibalba, into a dying star that is about to go supernova. As we watch this story we see Tom as he remembers his past lives and meditates on them, he is covered in tattoo rings up both his arms...one for every year, 500 in total.
The first ring is one small one on his left ring finger. This we see was done after Izzi's death, Tommy loses his ring in the beginning of the movie, and after she dies he tattoos himself with a ring to never forget his love.
As we journey with Tom, we watch him go through the steps of meditation, remembrance, and love. He speaks to the entity of the Tree, letting it know that the journey is almost over, the time of rebirth is close at hand. We watch Tom remembering Isabel and Izzi, going over each step in the grief process....denial, anger, bargaining, depression and, acceptance. Once he reaches the stage of acceptance he also reaches what appears to be a Nirvana type of self awareness. This is very evident with the visuals of his meditation in the traditional lotus position, and scenes that resemble Tibetan meditation rugs.
It is at the point of the Tree beginning to die before they reach their goal that we watch as Tom goes through the last of the 5 stages, finally realizing that true love is found through self-sacrifice and overcoming fear. Tom travels into the star giving his life causing the tree to be reborn through him and beginning a new cycle of life through his love.
So there you have the story in a small nutshell, each of these chapters is interwoven with the other to create a non-linear but coherent flow. It is at this point that I am going to deviate from my normal flow and give you some insights into the film, hopefully to give a better understanding of what has transpired.
The most common interpretation of the film is that Tommy is the true story, or reality as it were, with the story of the conquistador being that of Izzi's unfinished book The story of Tom, is thought by some to be the final chapters of the book that Tommy writes because of Izzi's request to "Finish it".
While others argue that the future Tom is Tommy that uses his discovery of the Tree to prolong his life. This future self is travelling to the nebula with the Tree, that sprang from a seed that Tommy planted over Izzi's grave, very much resembling the explanation given earlier by Izzi of the Mayan myth of the creation of the world from the First Father's body.
You probably have noticed throughout this I have referred to the Tree, as if it were a person. That is because the Tree plays as an important role as any person in the film. Many have said the Tree does represent Izzi as well...as you watch the film many of the shots with the Tree mirror shots of Tommy in his different incarnations. In example a close up shot of Tom whispering to the Tree and having the small fibers raise at his voice. This shot is mirrored by the scene of Tommy leaning in to whisper against the neck of a sleeping Izzi. You also see this in the shot of Tomas kneeling in front of his queen as it is also shown as Tom kneeling in front of the Tree in the exact same positions.
The eyes are another example of recurring shots to tie the story together. Each character has numerous shots that are close ups of the eyes, progressing from story to story, from dark to light. This evokes to mind the saying "The eyes are a window unto the soul", almost seemingly allowing us to glimpse into the character's true feelings and desires. You can also notice that each character is shown in different lighting, from dark with Tomas, to an almost blinding white with Tom. This seems to represent Tommy's path into enlightenment showing that he has no power over death, and his acceptance of the inevitable.
Another interpretation is that of reincarnation. Each story represents the life if the same character living out his life until he reaches enlightenment or "Nirvana". There are some cultures that look upon reincarnation as just this, you live your life out, die, and are born again, with all the same people in your circle over and over and over. This has some credence in the story with Izzi, she is Tommy's anchor in each story. Izzi is what keeps him from losing touch due to single-mindedness and to remember his human side, you might argue keeping that balance between the mind and the soul, intellect and emotion. you could even argue that the two characters represent the two sides to the brain, the left governing the sciences and intellect, and the right overseeing emotions and the arts.
Love and death are also two main themes running through the entire film. Tomas goes on his quest out of love for Isabel, only to face death due to his ego and greed. Tommy focuses on his work for one simple reason, love for Izzi and trying to save her from the inevitable death she is facing. Tom has reached for the stars due to his love for the Tree and Izzi, in the end sacrificing himself for that love so that she might live. His every action revolving around the Tree, in selfless sacrifice. This brings the story of Tommy and Izzi into full circle.
One final theme that you may notice is that of the circle or the ring. Tomas is given a ring by Isabel in the beginning to represent her devotion and betrothal to him. Tommy loses his ring at the start of his story, which you may notice is the same ring as Tomas'. Some say the loss of the ring shows Tommy's losing his path, immersing himself in work and losing his focus. The ring makes a final appearance in the end. Once Tom reach that enlightenment he seeks he finds the ring at his feet bringing his journey finally to an end.
All in all I have to admit that this film is one of my favorites. In the scope of writing this I think I may have seen it 6 or 7 times. The Fountain is not a film you can see just once there are so many interwoven stories, elements, scenes, and symbols, that it is impossible to take it all in with just one sitting. Everything comes together so well the lighting, the acting, scenery, and the music.....oh my god the music! I am not one to buy a movie soundtrack that is just the score, but after first seeing this movie years ago I did just that. The score to this film tells the story in itself....with recurring themes, stanzas and runs, if you close your eyes and really listen you can actually feel them weaving together into and audio tapestry.
Here is a small sample:
I will have to say that this movie is not in my top 100, nor is it in my top 50, hell it's not even in my top 20....it is firmly ensconced in my top my 10! I have loved this move from the first time I saw it, I'm actually thinking of watching it again tonight. I highly recommend this film for any one who likes a movie that plunges into the depths of you emotions and makes you think. A movie that I have seen make grown men cry, grow angry, gasp, and laugh all in one sitting of this film. Buy it, borrow it, get it off ITunes if you have to, but the point is sit down and watch it now! Find your anchor, find your meaning, find your love.......
The Fountain
Director: Darren Aronofsky
Written by: Darren Aronofsky
Starring: Hugh Jackman, Rachel Weisz, and Sean Patrick Thomas
I have to apologize...no recipes this time. The time I spent watching this over and over, making notes, listening to the music and enveloping me into writing this piece I was just not able to find the perfect fit....please forgive me....and don't worry the recipes will return.
What do you get when you mix a traditional Samurai movie, a Revenge film, Blaxploitation, Animation, and Samuel L. Jackson? You get Afro Samurai! Created in 2007 and put out by Gonzo studios this was not you're traditional anime. Following the story of Afro, as he seeks the killers of his father, the original "Number One" warrior. This story is told through a masterful blend of flashback, present time, and comic relief (provided by Samuel L. Jackson). Not to mention a great soundtrack provided by RZA.
This honestly is one of my favorites of the "new school" of anime. This combined some of the best elements of so many different genres, not to mention being masterfully drawn and "shot". Adding into this great choices for the voice work, and wonderful acting, you get the right combination to create something that would stand up in any theater as a majorly produced action film. This is one that I suggest anyone who is a lover of a good story and great action, go out and get this one now!
Afro Samurai
Written by: Takashi Okazaki
Starring: Samuel L. Jackson, Phil La Marr, and Yuri Lowenthal
"The term sin-eater refers to a person who, through ritual means, would take on by means of food and drink the sins of a household, often because of a recent death, thus absolving the soul and allowing that person to rest in peace. In the study of folklore sin-eating is considered a form of religious magic." This is the underlying premise of "The Order", a 2003 lesser known film of Heath Ledger's. Made about 2 years after "A Knight's Tale", this reunited most of the cast. Ledger plays Alex Bernier, a Catholic priest belonging to an obscure order focusing of destroying demons, ghosties and things that go bump in the night. Now add in evil prophecies, the "anti-pope" and an arcane tradition from outside the ancient Catholic church, and you get the gist of his story.
Mixing your genres of religious horror and mystery, this is a film that received little acclaim in the box office but has slowly built renown as a cult film. I have really enjoyed this film, and it has made it into my regular rotation. Heath Ledger and Benno Furmann truly offer up great performances, and the supporting cast including Peter Weller really are a joy to behold. So if you are looking for a good horror flick without the blood and gore, but still with a story to keep you on the edge of seat, then go pick this up. I doubt you will be disappointed.
The Order
Written by: Brian Helgeland
Directed by: Brian Helgeland
Starring: Heath Ledger, Benno Furmann, Shannyn Sossamon, Mark Addy, and Peter Weller
Rated: R
Runtime: 102 minutes
One of America's biggest shames in history is our history of slavery, there have been many movies, books and television shows on this issue, but what if we took a new look at it? Take an America where the white man was the one with a history of being a slave. 200 years later it is the white man who is living in the ghettos and the black man has the power and holds power in the affluent classes. John Travolta plays Louis Pinnock who in one day is mistaken as a voyeur by powerful CEO Thaddeus Thomas. The same day sees Louis beaten by black cops and evicted from his home. In return he kidnaps Thaddeus, demanding payback and justice, and along the way the two begin to know each deeper than just the stereotypes of what the one thinks of the other.
This movie was released in 1995, this was a year that gave us the Million Man March, the death of Jerry Garcia, the beginning of O.J.'s trial, and the first cloned sheep "Megan" and "Morag". Written and directed by Desmond Nakano, also known for "American Me" and "The Last Exit to Brooklyn". This was the first time I have seen this since '95 when it came out., and I will have to say it actually holds up fairly well. Taking a type of story that we have seen over and over in movies and T.V., however it takes a slight step to the left and flips the roles on their ears. Travolta and Bellafonte give fairly decent performances, and the storyline is actually entertaining. This is one that I would suggest taking some time to sit down and watch, but honestly this is one that if you don't see it you won't miss a whole lot. This one just never got off the ground, and despite the big stars was flop in the box office.
White Man's Burden
Directed by: Desmond Nakano
Written by: Desmond Nakano
Starring: John Travolta, Harry Bellafonte, Kelly Lynch
Rating: R
Runtime :89 minutes
If you mix a pedophilic evil step-father, add a wrongful death, a forced commitment to an institution, a dance club, ninjas, robots, dragons and lobotomies, what do you get? Sucker Punch! This is the story of Baby-doll. Hers is a sad story: Mom dies, leaves the money to Babydoll and her younger sister, which the evil step-father (who is not a nice person, hence the word evil) wants. Daddy dearest tries to get Babydoll in the bed and get her money, only to have her snap, grab a gun and accidentally kill lil' sis. Babydoll gets committed to the booby-hatch, and immerses herself in fantasy world to try and escape and then in her fantasy world immerses herself in multiple fantasy worlds....WHAAAAAAA?!?! I won't tell you more cause I don't want to spoil the nutty goodness that is this movie.
Released in 2011 this was Zack Snyder's first film based on an original script. This is a very visually compelling film, and even being somewhat of a new concept it feels very comfortable, like an old blanket you might use on a cold day. Many of the plot line points are re-hashes of old standbys but the way they are put together, as well as the many genres mixed together make this a fresh new look. The story also appeals to the comic book nerd in me, it has a very gritty graphic novel feel to it. All in all I would honestly suggest picking this one up...don't go in looking for a life-changing film, just check out mentally and enjoy the story while things blow-up!!
1985- The age of parachute pants, neon and pastel men's shirts, break dancing Alex Keaton and Dr. Huxtable. This year also was a boom in big screen sci-fi movies...everything from space vampires (Lifeforce), flying Deloreans (Back to the Future), and geriatric encounters of the third kind (Cocoon). But this was also the year of "Enemy Mine", the story of a Earthman and a pregnant Drac, but we'll get to that in a bit, so strap in, put your helmet on and get ready to learn why Mickey Mouse sucks, and family is more important than anything in wartime.
Alright space travellers you know the drill...you see the warning pic...so that means there are spoilers from here on out. So no complaining, because:
1. you have been warned
2. you are not allowed to whine and
3. because I have a Drac and I'm not afraid to use him!
This movie takes place in the late 21st century, humans have mastered space travel, met new species and declared war on them. The humans have formed the Bilateral Terran Alliance or BTA so that they can continue with their war against the Dracs...a race that is very reptilian in origin. Enter or two protagonists Willis E. Davidge and Jeriba Shigan. These two go up against each other in an inter-stellar battle resulting in both shooting the other down. Davidge and Jeriba both crash on Fyrine IV, a world alien to both. Both of our pilots survive to find that even though this planet is not the most hospitable it does have a breathable atmosphere, water and rather strange plant and animal life. Unfortunately, this little slice -o-paradise a bit out of the way for both races and rescue seems to be slim to none.
Fast forward three years...Davidge and "Jerry" have become fast friends...teaching on another their languages and about their culture, even with Jerry teaching Davidge his entire lineage in the oral tradition that is monumental in the Drac society. The two have come to rely on one another greatly, even saving the other's life again and again. This leads to one of the funniest scenes in the whole movie, where Jerry and Davidge get into a fight over religion and philosophy...of a sort:
Davidge: You know something, Jerry? Your great Shismar ain't shit!
Jerry: [angry] Earthman, your Mickey Mouse is one big stupid dope!
[Davidge tries not to laugh]
Davidge finds that the only humans that have come out here are "scavengers"..they are miners and smugglers that use Dracs as slaves. Davidge runs back to tell Jerry only to find out Jerry is pregnant. A series of unfortunate events cause them to leave their shelter, and during the rest of the pregnancy Davidge is taught Jerry's lineage...this will allow Davidge to present Jerry's child into the Drac society and allow him to be cared for.
Jarry dies giving birth and makes Davidge swear to take the child home to Draco. Davidge raises Zammis, Jerry's child, and teaches him the Draco language and his lineage. Zammis is captured by the scavengers, and it is up to Davidge to save him/her (Dracs are asexual). Without delving too far into it..Davidge overcomes the bad guys and save Zammis and the other enslaved Dracs.
Davidge is able to present Zammis to the council and recite his lineage and , later when Zammis comes forth as an adult with his own child...Willis Davidge is added to the lineage.
Granted this film did not do well in theaters, but it has become a cult phenomenon. I've heard it compared to Robinson Caruso in space, or the WW II film "Hell in the Pacific". They do have similar plot lines but this film to me stands by itself. It covers the feeling of aloneness creatures can feel, the need to survive and how sometimes the pettiness of fighting over land, resources, or religion need to be put aside to work to better both sides If you have not seen this I doubt you will be disappointed
Enemy Mine
Written by: Barry Longyear and Edward Khmara
Directed by: Wolfgang Petersen
Starring: Louis Gossett Jr., Dennis Quaid
This recipe seems to fit...ironically:
Fried Gator
Ingredients
1 pound alligator meat, cut into chunks (can substitute chicken or pork)
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
Flour, for dredging
1 cup buttermilk
1 cup hot sauce
1 bottle store bought ranch dressing, for dipping
Directions
Heat a deep-fryer to 350 degrees F.
Lightly season gator meat with salt and pepper prior to dredging them in flour. Combine buttermilk and hot sauce into 1 mixture. Dip the gator meat into the buttermilk and hot sauce mixture and dip, once again, in flour. Then place in deep fryer until golden brown, just a couple minutes. Drain on paper towels and serve with ranch dressing.
Take a slain undercover agent,his hot girlfriend swearing revenge by becoming an undercover hooker, gangsters, guns, cars and funky music...roll them together and what do you get? Foxy Brown!!! Originally meant to be a sequel of Coffy, the studio decided at the last minute that they didn't want to do a sequel, which is really puzzling since Coffy was a big hit. This movie has something for most audiences, and still holds up great today.
In an era where few films had a strong woman lead in an action film, this movie is a standout. Pam Grier in my opinion delivers an amazing performance. I remember the first time seeing this movie I was completely blown away, and it just seems to get better and better every time I see it. ( Not to mention that Pam Grier is so very hot in the movie) So anyone someone asks me for a great blaxpoitation action film I make sure this is at the top of the list. So my suggestion for this holiday season, run out and get this...granted it really doesn't have anything to do with the holidays, but it has Pam Grier (did I mention she's hot in this).
Foxy Brown
Directed by: Jack Hill
Written by: Jack Hill
Starring: Pam Grier, Antonio Fargas, and Peter Brown
Rated: R
Runtime: 94 minutes
The year was 1979...Star Wars has already happened, Star Trek is coming out with the new movie, and Disney is in a slump. Ok granted this part of the story did happen before 1979...but anyway, we'll just pretend alright. Sci-fi was coming to the forefront again and there was movie money to be made. Disney had yet to enter it's new era of the blockbuster animated film, and it's fans were growing up, so the decision was to make the first non-all-ages movie from Disney. The "Black Hole" is not your typical Disney movie. There are no talking animals, princesses who sing, or even a totally happy ending. Here we have death, dismemberment, "Zombies", robots, Heaven and Hell...even some language...super mild by today's standards, but before this, COMPLETELY unheard of in a Disney film. So grab your blaster, strap in and let's head down the hole.
THERE ARE SPOILERS FROM HERE ON OUT....YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED...NO WHINING OR WE THROW YOU OUT AN AIRLOCK!
We join the USS Palomino, in the year 2130, heading home after a lengthy deep space exploration mission. On the crew we have Capt. Dan Holland, Lt. Charlie Pizer, Dr. Kate McCrae (by the way...she's also psychic), Dr. Alex Durant, reporter Harry Booth, and V.I.N.CENT (Vital Information Necessary CENTralized) , he's a robot voiced by Roddy McDowall by the way.
As they are heading back they find a black hole that has ship stationary on it's edge, somehow avoiding being sucked into the gaping maw. Further scans find that this is the USS Cygnus that went missing many years ago...oh and this is also the ship that Kate's father Frank McCrae served on. So of course you have to follow formula and they decide to check out the "ghost" ship. ::insert creepy Scooby-Doo music here::
Our intrepid crew docks and comes aboard to find Dr. Hans Reinhardt (Maximillian Schell), his crew of faceless "drones", robots, and the android bodyguard Maximillian. Reinhardt tells our heroes that the ship was disabled so he sent the crew back to Earth, but Kate's father stayed behind and has since died. Reinhardt explains that he has been studying the black hole for years and intends to fly the Cygnus though it. Durant is the only one who thinks this is possible, crazy right?!? But then again Durant is played by every one's favorite psycho Anthony Perkins.
The rest of the crew spends their time exploring the old ship...seeeeeeeee JUST like Scooby-Doo. They witness some rather odd things like drones limping, a drone "funeral", and the crew's quarters full of old personal belongings. B.O.B. (Bio-sanitation Battalion), a robot very similar to V.I.N.CENT just an older model, and who is more beat up more than that first 200.00 car you drove in high school, explains to the heroes that the "drones" are actually the original crew who never left but were actually lobotomized. B.O.B. (who is voiced by Slim Pickens) reveals that the crew mutinied when Reinhardt revealed his "Mad Scientist" plan to fly into the black hole. It is also revealed that Kate's dad led the rebellion and was killed. V.I.N.CENT. tells Kate via telepathy ( I know...just go with it, ok) all of this. Kate then tells Durant who removes a "drone"'s faceplate revealing the withered"zombie" crew member. Durant and Kate try to flee and Maximillian kills Durant, by the most bloodless evisceration EVER, and Kate is taken to be lobotomized.
Captain Holland ( Robert Forster) rescues Kate (Yvette Mimieux) at the last minute, Harry Booth (Ernest Borgnine) panics and attempts to flee in the Palomino but is shot down by the Cygnus. This causes the Palomino to crash into the Cygnus damaging it's port side gravity nullifier, and then to add insult to injury a random meteor storm takes out the starboard side one. Now without being able to nullify the gravity from the black hole the Cygnus is beginning to be pulled in and pulled apart.
Our remaining crew, Holland, Pizer, McCrae, V.I.N.CENT., and B.O.B. head to a pre-programmed probe-ship to escape. Reinhardt is thinking the same thing and sends Maximillian to stop them. Reinhardt ends up being pinned by falling debris in the bridge, while his "drones" work on and ignore his plight. Maximillian tries to stop the crew, and cripples B.O.B. before V.I.N.CENT. cripples him. Maximillian is sucked out of the ship and is last seen drifting off into space. The crew and V.I.N.CENT make it to the probe and find out it is pre-programmed to fly into the black hole.
The epilogue of the film has no dialogue as the crew enters the hole. They (and we) are shown scenes via Kate's ESP of Heaven and Hell. First they travel through Hell as they see Reinhardt and Maximillian merge into one being, while standing on top of a huge rock, above a fiery landscape that appears to be populated with the "drones". Next, they enter Heaven....a crystal church-like tunnel with a floating "Angel". Finally they come out the other side of a "white hole" near a star and a planet. The movie ends here showing the probe heading towards the planet.
This has been a favorite of mine since it came out, I was 10 at the time ( this will be our secret, ok?). I first saw this on the big screen, and then later we owned it on Beta-max (for you young-un's out there Beta was what lost out to VHS, kinda like Blu-ray and HD DVD's), and then later on VHS. I honestly can't remember how many times I have seen this movie, and it never seems to lose it's charm for me. I have as of yet to acquire it on DVD, but I guarantee I will one day and will probably find a way to wear out the DVD. This really was groundbreaking for Disney, they showed here with this movie that they could run with the "big boys" and make movies other than kiddie cartoons. I honestly believe that if it were not for this film we would not have had cult hits like "Tron", "The Watcher in the Woods" or "Dragonslayer". I know today these seem like nothing, but back in 1979 this was really the "loss" of Disney's "innocence" as they grew-up and moved on into the "real world". If you can find this one, pick it up and watch it, I really think you won't be disappointed.
The Black Hole
Written by: Jeb Rosebrook and Bob Barbash
Directed by: Gary Nelson
Starring: Maximillian Schell, Anthony Perkins, Robert Forster, Joseph Bottoms, Yvetter Mimieux, Ernest Brognine, Roddy McDowall, and Slim Pickens
Rated: PG
Runtime: 98 minutes
This just seems fitting as accompaniment to the movie:
Preparation: Combine the chocolate, butter, and espresso in the top of a double boiler over hot, but not simmering, water, stirring frequently until smooth. Remove from the heat and let cool until the chocolate is just slightly warmer than body temperature. To test, dab some chocolate on your bottom lip. It should feel warm. If it is too cool, the mixture will seize when the other ingredients are added.
Meanwhile, whip the cream to soft peaks, then refrigerate. Once the melted chocolate has cooled slightly, whip the egg whites in a medium bowl until they are foamy and beginning to hold a shape. Sprinkle in the sugar and beat until soft peaks form.
When the chocolate has reached the proper temperature, stir in the yolks. Gently stir in about one-third of the whipped cream. Fold in half the whites just until incorporated, then fold in the remaining whites, and finally the remaining whipped cream.
Spoon or pipe the mousse into a serving bowl or individual dishes. Refrigerate for at least 8 hours. (The mousse can be refrigerated for up to a day.)
or if you prefer liquid refreshment.......
Black Hole recipe
1/3 ozBacardi 151 rum 1/3 oz Chartreuse herbal liqueur (strongest available) 1/3 oz Black Sambuca
Add your 151 and Chartreuse first then gently add the Sambuca. It will sit at the bottom whilst the 151 and chart' cloud it with a hazy look.. looking down at the shot looks like a misty black hole.
Take one son of Satan, make him lose a wager (a curling match to be exact), with an angel. So as punishment for losing he is forced for the next 1000 years to hand out gifts and presents to children. So here we are at Hell Township, modern day, and Santa is getting himself a little payback. Flying through town on his rocket propelled sleigh with killer "reindeer" (it's actually an ox), Santa proceeds to kill anyone and everyone in the most festive of Yuletide ways, making use of ornaments, eggnog, candy canes and all that ilk. All of this culminates in a great showdown with a twist that is really not that surprising if you're paying attention.
All in All I LOVE this film! It is one that you need to go into realising it is a Black Comedy/ Horror movie that has as much enjoyment in making fun of itself as it does giving winks to the film/TV buffs in the audience. This movie made a huge selling point by having one of the most famous Jewish wrestlers out there to play Santa, and he is perfect here. If you watch closely you will see other big named Jewish actors in the movie as well including : James Caan, Fran Drescher, Chris Kattan, and Rebecca Gayheart. This movie has gone down as a definite one in my Holiday rotation. so next time you and the family get together for Holiday get together pop this one in, get your cookies, and enjoy!
Written by:Dave Steinman
Directed by: Dave Steinman
Starring: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith, Emilie de Ravin
Rated : R
Runtime: 78 minutes
Trevor Reznik (played by Christian Bale) hasn't slept in over a year. He works in a factory as a lathe operator, and seems to be something of a loner. The other coworkers don't trust him, and then eventually turn on him, due to him causing a coworker to lose an arm in a machine accident. Trevor slowly has been spiraling into madness over the last year. Losing weight, hallucinating and becoming paranoid at the possibility that his coworkers are out to get him. All of this culminates in an ending that will shock and amaze you.
This movie in my opinion is truly on of Bales' greatest films. Starving himself to lose over 60 pounds for this movie, he creates a character that truly is haunting to look at and whose behaviors really show you the depth of madness guilt can create. I am really surprised as to how many people have never seen or even heard of this movie. I absolutely believe if you haven't seen this one, go out this very second, and find it!
This story follows the (mis)adventures of Gergory Hines as Colonel Jim McQuade , who has been tasked with stopping an evil robot. Ok so I'll back it up just a bit. Dr. Eve Simmons played by Renee Soutendijk, and by the way she also plays the Robot Eve VIII. Basically it's your man-hating scientist is commissioned by the government to make a robot. She makes said robot to look like her and gives it all her memories...including the " Johnny just dumped me he's a douche" memories. Now give her a self-preservation mode, hatred of humans, super strenght...oh and I forgot to mention a NUKE in her belly. Needless to say she goes hay-wire, Gregory Hines has to stop her, she kills anyone who tries to kill her and will set off the Nuke if you really piss her off! All in all...to me screams cheap Terminator plot but is a great movie for BAD movie night...other wise MEH! (and yes I said MEH) Oh and by the way not ONE dance number from Mr. Hines!
Written by:Duncan Gibbins and Yale Udoff
Directed by: Duncan Gibbins
Starring: Gregory Hines, Renee Soutendijik, Michael Greene
Runtime: 99 minutes
Rated R
In today's society we have this unique phenomena. For approximately two months from the end of October to the end of December we in America plunge into a frenzy of food, shopping, family and stress, and we do this voluntarily! We try to fashion our gatherings to represent a Norman Rockwell painting, but it usually ends up looking like "The Scream" by Edvard Munch. So in that spirit I bring you "Home for the Holidays"..starring Holly Hunter, Robert Downey Jr., Anne Bancroft, Charles Durning, Dylan Mc Dermott, Steve Guttenberg, Cynthia Stevenson, Claire Danes, and Geraldine Chaplin (daughter of the late, great Charlie Chaplin). This is a story, of love, regret, family and insanity....so hang on he we go kiddos!
FOLLOWING HERE THERE ARE SPOILERS...YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! SO NO WHINING!
Claudia Larson, is sick...not in the perverse way....she has a cold and is looking forward to getting some rest, however this is not to be. She is unexpectedly laid off from her job at the museum, which then spontaneously turns into a make out session with her now ex-boss. Leaving this rather awkward situation, she does her mini walk-o'-shame and meets her daughter Kitt, who is taking her to the airport to fly home for Thanksgiving with the family. As Kitt is dropping her mother off she reminds Claudia to relax and just "float" (remembering a snorkeling trip the two took together), and then casually lets her mother know that she will be having sex for the first time while Claudia is away, leaving her to wander off to her flight, leaving her coat behind. Not to worry when she lands Mom has got a nice 80's style puffy housewife coat for her to wear.
Arriving at her parents house she spends the day getting settled in, counting down to T-Day. That night as she is settling in for some sleep she is interrupted by a night-vision goggle wearing prowler in her bedroom, that turns out to be her mischievous little brother Tommy. Tommy decided to surprise everyone by driving down with what appears to be his new boyfriend Leo Fish, of course begging the question throughout the whole movie what happened to Tommy's longtime partner Jack. Enter the no nonsense sister Joanne and her humorless husband Walter. Now add into this mix the creepy depressing ex-high school-boyfriend Russell, who Claudia's mom is trying to set her up with, and you would think you're done. OOOOOH NO, you are forgetting the crazy Aunt, c'mon we have that ONE relative, Glady. Glady is rather eccentric (that's the nice way of saying she is off her nut), who has always harbored a crush on Claudia's dad and has penchant for giving away furniture to strangers.
Now the whole motley crew is assembled and the dinner debauchery can commence. Instead of just being able to sit down to a nice dinner like the mom wanted, things rapidly spiral out of control. Mom has her traditional turkey, while Joanne insists on her Tofu Turkey, or Tofurkey being served. This escalates into one of the funniest moments of turkey on human violence I have seen since the Mr.Bean debacle of 1992.
Ok I couldn't resist since this is one of my favorite scenes in the whole movie.
After this Joanne comes out and explains why she is so upset with Tommy...he and his partner, Jack, got married, and she is embarrassed because friends of her's know. Of course Claudia is happy and now can let on that she likes Leo, who is not Tommy's date, but the business partner for Tommy's restaurant endeavors. In a later scene Claudia treks over to her sister's house to bring leftovers and to talk things out. So while Joanne works out, refusing to stop to talk to her sister, it comes out just how unhappy she is and tells Claudia that basically if they weren't family that she would never associate with her. Claudia leaves there feeling unresolved and ready to go home. Come the next day Claudia is once more back at the airport heading home, to find that she is flying back with Leo. After some small talk looks like things may be looking a little up for her as she and Leo share a drink.
All in all I truly love this film...it has found it's way into my holiday rotation, right up there with little Ralphie and his Red Rider BB gun. It has the right mix of humor, drama, family dynamic ( granted it's REALLY a dysfunctional one), and a little bit of pathos. Robert Downey Jr.'s humor and hyperactivity is the perfect thing to put up against Holly Hunter's laid back and low key delivery. So I would say if you have been the cruel victim of the holiday massacre that is Thanksgiving this is the movie for you, and if you haven't, run out find a family and just insert yourself into the festivities...(the Management takes no responsibility for any jail time or restraining orders this may generate).
Home for the Holidays
Written by: Chris Radant and W.D. Richter (short story and screenplay respectively)
Directed by: Jodie Foster
Produced by: Jodie Foster
Starring: Holly Hunter, Robert Downey Jr., Anne Bancroft, Charles Durning, Dylan McDermott, Steve Guttenberg, Cynthia Stevenson, and Claire Danes
Rating: PG-13
Runtime: 103 minutes
In honor of Joanne's Tofurkey....and because some of you have asked for a Vegetarian dish:
Vegan Tofu Turkey ( Tofurkey )
Courtesy of Chefinyou.com
Basic Information
Prep Time: 8 hours to 1 day
Cook Time: 1 to 2 hours
Serves: 6 people
Ingredients
For the Tofu Turkey
5 14-oz. tubs extra-firm tofu
2 tsp. ground dried thyme
2 tsp. rubbed sage
1 tsp. onion powder
1 tsp. garlic powder
about 1 tsp orange zest (optional)
salt and pepper to taste ( if you want to use vegan bouillon powder, skip the salt)
For the stuffing - approximate measurements, use as per taste ( original recipe in VT 35th anniversary issue, Or use your own stuffing of choice)
about 4 cups of gluten free bread cubes ( or use oatmeal or whole wheat bread cubes)
1/2 cup almonds, coarsely chopped and toasted
1 small-medium red onion
1 celery stick
1 apple, peeled and diced ( i kept the peel)
1/2 tbsp fresh sage, cut into thin strips
1/2 tbsp chopped cilantro or parsley
1/4 tsp crushed red pepper
1/4 tsp ground peppercorns
1/4 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tbsp maple syrup
1/2 tbsp balsamic vinegar
1/4 cups dried cherries
1/2 cup no-salt vegetable broth or water
Method
1
Method ( Tofu Turkey - Previous night Bring the tofu to room temperature. Squeeze tofu of excess water and take small bits and place them in a processor.
2
Process them little by little until smooth.
3
Place them in a large bowl and mix all the seasoning. You can at this point even taste the tofu and add more seasoning or flavor to make sure it does not taste real bland.
4
Wet cheesecloth, wring it out and smoothly line a colander with it—no wrinkles.
5
Drop the tofu inside the colander and press it into the sides and bottom of the colander.
6
Place this colander on a plate. Bring the hanging cheesecloth on the sides into the center to cover the tofu.
7
Now place a plate right on top of the tofu and give it a slight press. Use a heavy object to place on top of the plate. This is to help the tofu drain excess water through the colander. Place this inside the refrigerator overnight (ideal time). This helps the tofu to absorb the seasoning well too.
8
Method (On day of making the tofu turkey) - For the Stuffing I eyeballed most of the ingredients, so use your discretion when preparing them. Place the cubed bread cubes on a baking sheet and bake them in a preheated 225F oven for 20-30 minutes or until dry and crisp.
9
Meanwhile, heat a skillet. Add about 1 tsp oil and saute the onions and cook for 3-4 minutes or until soft. Add celery and saute for 2 minutes more.
10
Stir in the apples along with other seasonings. Cook for 5 minutes. Add maple syrup and the vinegar and remove from heat.
11
Combine the bread cubes along with apple mixture. Stir in almonds and dried cherries. Transfer to a greased baking sheet and pour broth over the top. Cover with foil and bake for 20-30 minutes or until the stuffing begins to brown on top. You can make a crisp filling by removing the foil and baking for 10 minutes more.
12
Method - For the Marinade Mix all the ingredients for the under the marinade until combined.
13
Method - For the Assembly Preheat oven to 375F. Drain the Tofu water from the plate on which you placed the colander.
14
Remove weight and plate from colander.
15
Now scoop some tofu from the center. Make sure to leave at least 1-2 inches on the sides and bottom.
16
Now fill this hollow with the stuffing.
17
Now top the stuffing with the scooped out tofu.
18
Make sure to smooth the surface and level it out.
19
Place a large oven to table baking sheet (I used a pie plate large enough to cover the colander opening) on top of the colander.
20
Hold tightly, and slowly invert colander onto the plate so that tofu-turkey drops gently onto dish.
21
Now slowly remove the cheesecloth from the tofu.
22
Can you see the white dome now?
23
Baste the tofu turkey with the prepared marinade.
24
Bake for 15 minutes.
25
Baste again. reduce the heat to 350F and bake for another 1 hour, basting as many times it strikes your fancy.
26
Once baked, you see a beautifully crisped tofu surface.
The most amazing after effects of this meal with striking similarities to the real thing -
1) We felt full in matter of minutes. The tofu protein did it.
2) The crust was crispy and meaty inside. The stuffing added amazing combo to the tofu. A few bites of the orange and apple in the middle (which I placed as a garnish) also went v well with this tofurkey.
3) We had LEFTOVERS and lots of them
But one advantage over the real turkey would be low calorie content comparatively me thinks
